Today’s Gospel is about a wedding banquet and that opens the door for me to talk about marriage.
I believe that we don’t say enough about marriage during our Sunday Masses and the wedding banquet in today’s Gospel gives me an opportunity to do so. I will share one story and several church teachings about Christian marriage.
Christopher Reeve had the lead role in the 1978 movie called Superman. He also had the lead role in Superman II which came out in 1980. In 1987 he met Dana and he fell in love with her and married her four years later. Then in May of 1995 Christopher and his horse entered a contest which is called show jumping competition. During one of the jumps he was thrown from his horse and suffered a spinal cord injury which left most of his body paralyzed.
Christopher assumed that Dana would leave him and marry someone else. But she said, “No, No. I still love you. I need you and you need me. We will stay together.”
In spite of everything, Dana had a positive attitude and she helped Christopher develop a positive attitude about his condition. She was more than resilient. She was joyful about life. The couple's affection for one another was always visible. Even though Christopher couldn't feel his wife's touch, she was constantly putting her hand on his arm or kissing his cheeks.
Some people called her a saint. She didn't like that. She said “I'm just a woman whose husband fell off a horse and I'm taking care of him and that's what you do when you are married to someone.” He survived almost ten years after the accident, until his death from heart failure at age 52 in 2004. Dana died two years later at the age of 44 because she had lung cancer.
The point of the story is that Dana and Christopher had a bond of love which could not be broken. They had a lot to deal with; but they remained faithful to each other. They were loyal to each other in spite of their difficult situation. Now I would like to look at the Catholic definition of marriage.
The Catholic Church says that Christian Marriage means the sharing of life and love. That is the Catholic definition of marriage. Each word is important…… sharing…. Life….. Love…. (repeat) “Christian marriage is the sharing of life and love.”
These words come from the Second Vatican Council and the 1983 Code of Canon Law. The areas of sharing in marriage include:
1. Sharing leisure activities - hobbies, sports, music, art, movies, and dance. I remember how my parents loved to dance!
2. Sharing ideas in everyday discussions and planning for the future
3. Sharing common tasks, housework, yard work, working together for a common cause in their parish or the local community
4. Communication is another area of sharing: being honest, trusting, truthful, giving constructive feedback to each other
5. Emotions: sharing significant feelings - such as the feeling of sadness when one of your parents dies and feelings of joy when your children are born
6. Sharing the responsibilities and joys of raising children if God blesses you with children.
7. Affection: touching and receiving touch….. As did Dana and Christopher Reeve.
8. Sharing crises: coping with problems and pain, standing together in the major and minor tragedies of life
9. Sharing times of prayer in your church and in your home
That is just a partial list of all that can be shared in a Christian marriage. Just a partial list.
Love can be defined in myriad ways, but in marriage "I love you" really means "I promise to be there for you all of my days." I will be there for you. It is a promise that says, "I'll be there when you lose your job, lose your health, lose your parents, lose your good looks, lose your confidence, lose your friends." It's a promise that tells your partner, "I'll build you up; I'll overlook your weaknesses; I'll forgive your mistakes; I'll put your needs above my own; I'll stick by you even when the going gets tough." This kind of assurance will hold you steady through all of life's ups and downs, through all the "better or worse" conditions.
The Lord has demonstrated throughout the ages that He keeps His promises—including the most important one of all, reserving a spot in heaven for each of His followers, for all eternity. Since God keeps His promises, we must keep ours too—especially the one we made before God, our family, our friends, and our church on our wedding day.
And now for a few words about the marriage covenant. Covenant is a word that comes to us from the Bible and it means an agreement made in the presence of God. Many people don’t know that marriage is a covenant. Most people in our country think that marriage is a contract. Almost every movie and almost every TV show and many websites describe marriage as a contract. But in the Christian world marriage is a covenant - and that is very different!
For example, a contract is for a limited period of time; while a covenant lasts forever. A contract engages only a part of a person; while a covenant engages the whole person. LeBron James does not give his whole life to the Los Angeles Lakers - just his basketball skills. In the marriage covenant you give your total self to your spouse.
Children can enter into contracts; but only mature adults can make a covenant. A contract is witnessed by the state while a covenant is witnessed by God. Within our Church we ask each other to think about marriage as a covenant. Just as the Bible says that Jesus has a covenant love for his people so we expect spouses to have a covenant love for each other. When we say that marriage is a covenant we are saying that it is sacred.
We also say that marriage is a sacrament. Notice how Sacred and Sacrament are spelled almost the same. Marriage is sacred and it is a sacrament.
The Bible says that God is love and when wives and husbands give love to each other they are giving God to each other. That is what makes matrimony sacred. When they give love to each other they are giving God to each other because God is love. And with that I conclude my homily for today.
Matrimony is a sacrament in our church. Matrimony is sacred because God is Love and spouses give God to each other when they love each other.